On May 2, 2021, my boy Ozzy crossed the Rainbow Bridge. He never quite made it to his 4th birthday.
When he was about 2 ½ years old, he was diagnosed with Hypertrophic Cardiomyopathy and congestive heart failure, and I had to make the decision at the emergency vet that night whether I would try to save him with medications and treatment for the rest of his life or end his short life at that point. I chose the former, knowing that his life would not be as long as a normal cat’s would be. Ozzy had a great life; whatever Ozzy wanted to do, Ozzy got to do. He was doing really well, taking his medicine twice a day, and all was good, but he was tired a lot – and one day as he was laying on my chest, I noticed his heartbeat was SO FAST. I took him back to his cardiologist, and on top of everything else, he now had arrhythmia and tachycardia which would require two more medications. I tried so many forms of these medications and so many ways to get him to take them without forcing them, but in the end, everything I did wasn’t enough.
My husband and I had a weekend trip planned (the first time we were leaving overnight since Covid). I was nervous, but my sister was coming over several times a day to give Ozzy his meds and sit with him. The last time I saw him alive was Friday afternoon when I kissed him goodbye, told him to be a good boy and that I loved him, and I would see him Sunday.
On top of trying to cope with intense grief, I was dying from guilt and the “if onlys”. I had just gone through a grieving process 4 years before when Lily died at 15 of diabetes. Ozzy helped me through that.
About 10 days later I started looking at Petfinder, Humane Society, Craigslist…..looking for a buddy. I can’t be without a cat in my life; I’m incomplete. There’s a cat shaped piece in my heart that I lose when I lose one of my best friends, and I’m not a whole person until I fill it.
As I was scrolling, I came across “Butch” on The Cat Network site. He caught my eye because he looked so much like Ozzy. I started to cry and immediately filled out an application. Then I noticed Butch had two brothers, and the little black cat looked like Lily (his name was Tiny), and I prayed that Butch and Tiny would be mine. That Saturday, my prayers were answered. We did change their names – Butch is now Casper and Tiny is now Spooky – and these 11 month old brothers are helping me smile again….and laugh!
I forgot what it’s like to have young, healthy cats! They chase each other around the house, up and down the basement stairs, wrestle constantly, and then lay together and groom each other. I am already in love with them both.
I still miss Ozzy, and I’ll never forget that sweet but sick little boy, but Casper and Spooky have helped me find joy in my life, and I can feel that cat shaped hole in my heart filling again.
A special thanks to Kristi for listening to my stories, my tears, and letting me adopt these two beautiful boys.
~ Terri S.
